Times change, and language changes to reflect it. Janna Barkin, author of He Has Always Been My Son, talks about the importance of using the pronouns that people choose to reflect their gender identity that may differ significantly from the gender they were assigned at birth.
Janna tells us what it is that people want us to know in their pronoun choices? What are the non-binary pronouns that are not gender specific? Let us take a step back and ask what is non-binary in reference to gender? Cisgender? How do we know what a person’s gender identification is? Do we count on dress and outer appearance to know gender preference (spoiler is “no”)?
Because being misnamed can be a sign of disrespect leaving a person feeling dismissed and invalidated, Janna has developed a program of becoming accustomed to the shift in gender assignment that so many people have chosen.
Parents, grandparents, friends, colleagues all have to get used to speaking with ease in a new way to people who have shifted into the gender that joins their inner and outer selves. One of the exercises is writing letters! Of course, writing love and acceptance letters to get used to seeing a person as he or she wants to be seen. To see the exuberance in Janna’s eyes as she talks about all this is the first of several lessons in the joy that can be yours as you welcome someone as is into your heart and life.